ganduri...

Simplicity

I’m reading a book outside, on the balcony of my house. I have my Vanilla Coke next to me so I don’t need anything else. Around me it’s crazy: someone is cutting their lawn, my neighbors are listening to music- that kind of music romanian listen at their weedings, my mom is on the phone with one of her friends, Pisoi is playing with a lizard. I mean, there is a lot of activity around me. I take a brake from reading and I just listen. Observe. Focuse. I swear this moment is perfect! It takes me back to my childhood, those summer days when my only concern was what game should we play when me and my friends will meet. When my dad just came home from work and gave us money to buy Coke or ice cream, or whatever we wanted that day. Of course, mom wasn’t supposed to know because too many sweets or too much Coke is not good for us. But dad didn’t care. If I look in front of me I can see our dollhouse, or on the right there is the swing we broke so many times; over there I can see the skates or the bike I was always afraid to ride. It’s like I’m watching a movie with all my childhood memories.

Anyway, I think it will rain. I can hear the thunders and see the lightning. At this point I don’t even care, and that’s something.

Nothing compares to this. This feeling, this house, this small village, my home. Wherever I go, there’s no place that can make me feel like this. But, sadly, this is not enough for me. It’s special and priceless, but not enough. So I try to keep this moment as long as possible.

But eventually I know I gotta go….

It’s raining. I told you it will rain…

ganduri...

13 reasons why I love it!

First time I’ve heard about „13 reason why” was on Twitter two weeks ago. So it made me curious because I think the subject the TV show is focusing on is a major problem all around the world. So I didn’t even think about it and started the first episode. It stroke a chord on me from the first minutes so it only took me two days to finish it. And I also re-watched it with my sister. And I think everybody should watch it. It’s brutally honest and so so real. And I’m not saying it just because I liked the show so much. But because this subject is so sensitive and painful, but people prefer to ignore it than deal with it. Which is really wrong.

Bullying is a major problem and it causes so much pain and suffering. It’s the reason why over 160 k teens skip school every day, and 1 in 10 drop out of school because they are repeatedly bullied. And that’s only in USA. So, instead of saying „13 reasons why” glamorize teen suicide, why don’t you try to find solutions to this problem that has such a big impact on our teens? Why not react and intervene? Why not try to stop it? Instead of focusing on criticizing one of the most real TV show out there today, try and see what you can do to help stop this practice that is killing our children? Actions not words.

So, here are my 13rw I love this TV show:

  1. It focuses on showing the ugly truth. No lies, no sweet talking.
  2. Some of the reasons why Hannah committed suicide were so normal and even tho they seem small and unimportant they aren’t like that, which shows that even if we take it as a joke, someone out there is not.
  3. The TV show deals with other subjects like drinking and driving; the absence of parents, who prefer to ignore their children and give them everything than to be there and listen to them; relationships; drugs; rape; school counselors who are not really listening; and so many more.
  4. The music. Ohhh, the music is absolutely amazing.
  5. The actors. So freaking good acting. You can see they put so much passion and hard work into it. They really got into their characters.
  6. The heartbreaking suicide moment. Yes, I watched it. Because I wanted to take it all in. I think the way they did it’s perfect, if I can say that. I liked that they changed it from the book. The way she does it it shows that killing yourself is not easy or fashionable. It’s hard and painful and lonely.
  7. Even tho life is hard and sometimes you feel like there’s nothing you can do, killing yourself is not the answer. Like Clay did, you can find so many other reasons to live.
  8. It showed that death doesn’t only happens to you. It happens to everyone around you.
  9. The 13rw production team opened a hotline for teens who are being bullied and want help. You can find it at www.13reasonwhy.info 
  10. It makes you wanna react. It makes you angry. And you can use that to do something good about it. Focusing on helping others and listen more when someone comes to you for an advice.
  11. You find other people like you. You’ll see you’re not the only one having problems and there are others dealing with the same stuff like you.
  12. I think the show makes parents paying more attention to what’s going on with their children.
  13. If you watch the show you’ll see that in the last episode the time of the action is in November 2017; that means Hannah is still alive and the events in the TV show didn’t happen yet. That is a smart way to make you see that you can still do something for someone if you see them struggling. You have time to do something. To take action. To stop bullying. To react whenever you see someone being bullied.

I recommend this TV show. It’s not just for teens. It’s for all of us. It’s a reality wake up call. So good, so so good. Amazingly good.

ganduri...

It’s a mad mad world out there

Last night I’ve finished ’13 reasons why’.  I belive it’s the only tv show out there that shows the ugly truth. They even say it’s better than the book. That’s something rare.

You won’t find there any exaggerations, or unrealistic, impossible situations. Just the truth. Bulllying is such a big problem for today’s kids. I’ve never understood this evilness the kids have. Why bullying someone just because they are different? Or they aren’t rich, or they are smarter than you? How does it make you feel? I had bullies in HS. And I’ve stood up to them everytime I’ve witnessed an injustice happening. Things weren’t as bad as they are today but there were issues. What teenagers these days don’t understand or accept is that we all make mistakes. Especially when we’re young. Going to a party, drinking a beer or two, going out with your crush. Everything can go wrong from here. But that doesn’t make us sluts or alcooholics, or desperate for attention. At that age you don’t know 100% what is right or wrong. Don’t judge what you can’t understand. We are all different. Try and think what is like to be in somebody else’s position, try and think what would you have done if you were them.  But that’s the thing. We judge and don’t think before we act or speak.

I think all this starts from our families. Parents these days don’t care about what might happen. They buy phones to their kids starting from an early age, like 3 or 4. Kids have acces to the internet and stay in front of their computers all day long instead of going outside and play with other kids. Parents prefer to make them silent instead of dealing with the problem. Caught in their own problems, they just won’t ‘look’ at their children.

We are doing this to ourselves. We are the only ones to blame. And this is just the beginning.

 

ganduri...

No subject!

„30 years old and not married”,  „OMG, she’s 30 and she’s not married. She doesn’t have kids, what is wrong with her?”. That’s how people from home would say about me. My family, my neighbors, acquaintances. I can feel their judging eyes every time I go out or I see them on the streets. But I don’t fucking care. I have one thing to tell them: fuck off! I mean, I have to understand them. That’s what romanian society teach us. Yes, it still does…Fuck, it’s like I’m sick and I will die tomorrow, like life at 30 is over. But like I said, I have to understand them. Anything that’s unusual, it’s bad for them. It doesn’t bother me or affect me, it’s just something I’ve noticed a lot in the last couple of years, especially these last couple of months.

Now, I have one question for them: why should I marry someone if that’s not my goal in life? At least not right now. I can’t say that won’t change tomorrow, or in a week, in a month, in a year. But right now it’s not.

Marriage is a piece of paper you sign or some vows you say in a church. Nothing else. Like a piece of paper would stop you from fighting all the time, sometimes even becoming violent. Or cheating on your girlfriend one month before your wedding, or divorcing because you only married for money. Yes, those are real life situations I’ve witnessed.

That’s wrong and bad. Not wanting to live your life, to have a career, to travel and meet extraordinary people, or wait until you meet the right person. Yes, the right person.

I believe in marriage that last a lifetime. That’s what I’m looking for. I don’t fall in love easily. You have to be pretty special. I’m also not perfect or special. God, I don’t even consider myself beautiful. But I’m also not like the rest of them. And I’m proud of that. I’m a tomboy, god dammit! I listen to hip-hop and prefer jeans and snickers, instead of girly dresses or heels. I’m very, VERY sarcastic. Come on, I’m a 48 kg skinny girl, sarcasm is my only defense (like Chandler would say 😀 ) And that’s what people don’t understand. They don’t understand that you can be happy even if you’re single. And that is ok to wait a little longer than marry the wrong person.

I’m sorry but I rather be single than be with someone just because that’s how it should be, according to some people. I hate monotony, to do the exact same thing all day. To go to the mall once a week and that’s it. That’s the only fun I can have. Hell no!!! I want midnight adventures, spontaneity, craziness.

I like to say I’m 30 going on 18, because that’s how I feel. I’m not the type of girl who would give up on her dreams to be with a guy. Maybe just if that guy is someone who I trust won’t hurt or disappoint me. I’m unpredictable, I always speak my mind even if it bothers you, always tell you in your face what I think and always, but always, do what I think it’s best for me. I’m not letting others to dictate me what to do. Not anymore…

So yeah, fuck off! I’m 30 and I’m not married with kids. I’m 30 and act like 18. I’m 30 and I still take risks. I’m 30 and I’m still dreaming like a teenage girl. That’s me baby, and not gonna change. 😉

Fuck your bad vibes, bro!

ganduri... · sentimente

…în acest moment eu renunţ!

Dragi oameni ai legii, faptul că aveți această autoritate nu vă face superiori sau mai oameni ca noi. Daca ne aflăm într-o anumită situație pentru că am avut încredere în ‘prieteni’ şi acum plătim scump pentru asta, nu înseamnă că suntem oameni de nimic, că nu avem o educație sau că nu merităm respect. Nu vă adresați cu ‘mă’, ‘fată’, ‘asta’, ‘ăsta’. Aveți măcar respect mai ales atunci când noi vă respectăm. Sau respectați vârsta dacă de altceva nu țineți cont. Dar mă rog, asta depinde şi de cei 7 ani de acasă.

Am tot zis că vreau să plec din țară. După ziua de azi aş fugi într-o secundă. Pentru că m-am săturat să fiu umilită şi tratată ca ultimul criminal. Asta e țara în care trăiesc. Şi să nu vă aud că ziceți că nu sunt româncă adevărată sau că îmi reneg rădăcinile.

Iubesc România, îmi iubesc casa dar urăsc sistemul ăsta şi instituțiile statului care funcționează în aşa fel încât să fure ‘legal’ bani de la oameni, urăsc corupții care ne conduc şi care ne-au distrus. Urăsc superioritatea unora care dacă au un baston în mână se cred zei, urăsc cum sunt umiliți oamenii care le plătesc salariul. Însă îi puteți umili, fura, batjocori dar niciodată nu le veți putea lua demnitatea.

Din păcate nu pot să fug azi, dar ‘mâine’ o voi face. Mă rog doar ca acel ‘mâine’ să vină cât mai curând.

Iar astăzi, de ziua noastră națională, vreau să îmi cer iertare ție, iubita mea țară. Îmi cer iertare strămoşilor mei, celor care au luptat să ne unească. Îmi cer iertare pământurilor, apelor, munților, pădurilor. Îmi cer iertare că nu pot face nimic să păstrez moştenirea strămoşilor mei. Îmi cer iertare, România mea frumoasă, că nu pot să lupt pentru tine. Dar eu nu mai pot să trăiesc aici.

Oamenii tăi au distrus ultima speranță pe care o mai aveam. Noi aştia puținii care încă mai avem principii şi valori nu suntem de ajuns. Ceilalți sunt mult prea numeroşi, se înmulțesc prea repede. Nu putem ține pasul.
Poate greşesc, dar în acest moment eu renunț…

ganduri...

Just a thought…

It’s funny how some people make you feel small and unimportant. Summer of 2015 was a good one. Until a couple of days ago I thought it was great. But it wasn’t.  I cried a lot of times, I felt lonely, miserable, unappreciated, bullied, completely and utterly alone.

Sure, I spent my summer in US, living my dream, but if I had to sum it up, I couldn’t say it was a great experience.

But this year, ohhh this year…

This year I feel so alive and lucky. And so damn grateful. The people I’ve met made me feel important; they’ve appreciated me, they’ve seen my hard work and they respected me. Now this was the great summer ever. And I know next year will be even better.

Life thought me that you will meet a lot of people. With some of them you will talk from time to time, some of them will lie to you, some will make you feel small, and some will break your heart. But some of them, the great ones, will remain there, in your heart and by your side. They will make you feel you’re loved and they won’t forget about you. And you will learn how to live without the bad ones. I’ve learned. The hard way. But I’ve learned.

But after tonight, I don’t even care about the people from my past, the ones who aren’t here. I just love this. The present. And the people living it with me. Tonight, I am lucky and extraordinary grateful.

 

ganduri...

Women in IT

My cousin wrote a great article about sexual harassment at work. What do you think? Do you agree with her? I do!

Girl talk

This most likely will hit you like a random rant, but I have spent a lot of time thinking about this during my career.

Just to give you a little background about me, I have been working in the IT field for almost 9 years. I started off as a software packager and continued in the Quality Assurance area. At the moment, I am working as a Project Manager, I work from home and it is honestly the best option for me for several reasons.

The main reason I like working from home is that it keeps people you work with at a distance. This might sound strange, but I will try to do my best to explain why this is important to me.

During my career I have worked for several companies, and at each of them, most of my colleagues were men. Sometimes I find it easier to work with…

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